tradition, rendition, repetition;
When I was in kindergarten, I aspired to be a policewoman, but that dream slowly evolved and I suddenly wanted to be a firefighter. But those childish dreams changed and in the days of Primary school, the "in" thing was wanting to be a rockstar, a teacher, sometimes even the president. Well, for me, it was always to be a rockstar. Although I still have that (not so) secret dream of wanting to just like Hannah Montana, but that's besides the point.
Secondary school came along and my dreams of wanting to a rockstar dissolved, and I didn't quite believed in dreams anymore. Occasionally, I did dream of wanting to be a zoologist or a writer or a fashion designer, but dreams just somehow seemed so kiddish? I don't know. Things happened, friends come and go, and I found myself becoming more and more, what do you call it, emo. Not something I would have ever expected myself to be, but I found comfort in it, knowing it could serve to be a hideaway from people, things, problems I didn't wanna face. But this brought out my alter-ego, I would always be the noisy, funny one. Doing the stupid things no one else would ever do, I would be laughing with everyone else but it felt so cheap. Just like in the song 'Masquerade' in POTO, and the lyrics go like this:
Masquerade,
paper faces on parade,
hide your face so the world will never see you.
I guess I was like that. I had one or two good friends, the kind that you could tell anything to, but whenever I wanted to share with them how I felt about life and such, I realised I sounded very stupid and I would just laugh it off again, Maybe its just me, but I'm really not good at telling people my problems. I guess its because I don't know how to put it, but its better keeping things to yourself than having to share them with people.
You taught me not to cry because its over, but smile because it happened. And for this I thank you, for teaching me to live my dreams and for reminding me that not alls lost.
Secondary school came along and my dreams of wanting to a rockstar dissolved, and I didn't quite believed in dreams anymore. Occasionally, I did dream of wanting to be a zoologist or a writer or a fashion designer, but dreams just somehow seemed so kiddish? I don't know. Things happened, friends come and go, and I found myself becoming more and more, what do you call it, emo. Not something I would have ever expected myself to be, but I found comfort in it, knowing it could serve to be a hideaway from people, things, problems I didn't wanna face. But this brought out my alter-ego, I would always be the noisy, funny one. Doing the stupid things no one else would ever do, I would be laughing with everyone else but it felt so cheap. Just like in the song 'Masquerade' in POTO, and the lyrics go like this:
Masquerade,
paper faces on parade,
hide your face so the world will never see you.
I guess I was like that. I had one or two good friends, the kind that you could tell anything to, but whenever I wanted to share with them how I felt about life and such, I realised I sounded very stupid and I would just laugh it off again, Maybe its just me, but I'm really not good at telling people my problems. I guess its because I don't know how to put it, but its better keeping things to yourself than having to share them with people.
You taught me not to cry because its over, but smile because it happened. And for this I thank you, for teaching me to live my dreams and for reminding me that not alls lost.
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