terrified

You said it again,
my heart's in motion,
every word feels like a shooting star.
I'm at the edge of my emotions,
watching the shadows burning in the dark.
I'm in love, and I'm terrified.
For the first time,
in the last time in my only life.

- Kara Dioguardi and Jason Reeves

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I'm hurt, I'm angry,
I knew I should never have started it but I still did anyway I guess this is just the consequence for not putting You before everything. I always thought I had control over it but now I suddenly don't know what to do and I lost someone important. Okay Good Job Deborah you totally deserve a pat on the back. I don't even know who you are anymore. I feel like I am being punished for not listening to my parents. It'll take time so maybe if I don't smile as often or if I'm not as bubbly I'm sorry I need time to forget about what an idiot I was. Its ironic when people say " I understand/know how you feel" because emotions belong to you and only you.

But like always, I'll get over it.

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