racing, as fast as we can

Are there no shadows where you are?
I can see everything as day
Problems that you try to hide away
Pushing me aside

complete and utter bullshit.

I don't know what you want.

I don't know what to be, how to be.

I don't know how to pretend its nothing.

I don't know anything.

Am I expecting too much from someone who doesn't need to prove to me anything? Probably. Expectations, I hate them, I always expect too much and end up feeling disappointed when things don't happen the way I picture them to play out. I managed to be void of expectations ever since that happened, but then recently I've been expecting too many things, and although knowing its all childish and groundless expectations, I still put my faith in it all and place bets with myself over things I obviously know wouldn't happen. I am my own worst enemy.

and, I'm mostly just tired of being it. I want to be the nonchalant one sitting in the corner while you make your way to come talk to me, and not the other way round, like it always is. ):