You should date an illiterate girl

"But of all things, the girl who reads knows most the ineluctable significance of an end. She is comfortable with them. She has bid farewell to a thousand heroes with only a twinge of sadness.

Don’t date a girl who reads because girls who read are the storytellers. You with the Joyce, you with the Nabokov, you with the Woolf. You there in the library, on the platform of the metro, you in the corner of the café, you in the window of your room. You, who make my life so god damned difficult. The girl who reads has spun out the account of her life and it is bursting with meaning. She insists that her narratives are rich, her supporting cast colorful, and her typeface bold. You, the girl who reads, make me want to be everything that I am not. But I am weak and I will fail you, because you have dreamed, properly, of someone who is better than I am. You will not accept the life that I told of at the beginning of this piece. You will accept nothing less than passion, and perfection, and a life worthy of being storied. So out with you, girl who reads. Take the next southbound train and take your Hemingway with you. I hate you. I really, really, really hate you."

This article made me cry and ache the same hollow ache that's always been there, nudging me like an uncomfortable and irritating itch, further and further into my own state of nothingness. I don't want to be the 'literate' girl. I detach way too easily, I can't help it. I don't see anything as the end. I am just like that.

The night we sat on the couch and cried, and I told him I didn't feel anything anymore. That was an unspeakable tragedy of our pathetic love story. How many of you have been so hurt or pained and at the same time so caught offguard that you find yourself instantaneously void of any emotion. If you have not, please do not be quick to judge, in fact, do not bother with this weak attempt of a blog entry. But at the same time, If you have, I can only hope you identify and somehow try to understand the sort of feelings I am trying to sort out on my own.

I'm begging you to be my escape.