steady

I'm quite used to waiting.

Waiting for better things to come, waiting for myself to change, waiting to grow up, waiting for miracles. And so, now it feels like my waiting has taken a bit of a backseat. In its stead I've had to consciously choose to be present; completely engaged so I don't watch on the bleachers as one too many tiny, good moments slip by.

How good is it to be dependent on someone who knows me better than I know myself.
For He gives good gifts, and shows love that transcends my fallible human understanding. In tangible ways - through thoughtful prayers, kindness, and assurances of his mercy that are new every morning. I'm so thankful to have met S. Even if it doesn't last, (in it's own idyllic way), I'm having to re-learn things I've always thought to have known better. Let me stop measuring this by days or weeks. Let me stop anticipating the end of things. In its stead, let me trade these empty expectations for a hand to hold, a heart of stone for a heart of flesh.